Things I have learned about life

Here is a quick list of things I have learned in my 50 some years of living. While some of these are clichés, there is a reason clichés become clichés.

Life is not fair.
Contrary to TV sitcoms and dramas. Real life does not neatly wrap itself up in half hour or hour increments. Usually it just leaves you hanging there wondering “What the Hell was that all about?”  (On the other hand, watching shows like Lost and Heroes has that same effect)

The good guy does not always win. 
If life were fair, all the assholes and mean beans would have a very short life span. “Oops, your bad.” ZAP!

Instead, a lot of them wind up running our companies, our government, and our lives. Meanwhile, some really kind hearted people lead lives of deep desperation.

All you can do is treat others like you would like to be treated, and hope the game of life doesn’t  kick your ass. Even when it does, your only recourse is to get up and try again.

When things are really bad, they can only get better.
Just when you think things can’t get any worse, they sometimes do. At some point they HAVE to get better. Even if it’s a tiny bit of happiness, enjoy it, hold on to it, because the reverse is also true;

If things are going great, it won’t last.
Just won the lottery? Business going great? Don’t get cocky. Meet the tax man, or all your new, desperately needy friends, and that new cut throat competitor.
Again, enjoy the good times for all they are worth. While things are good, don‘t forget to:

Hope for the best, plan for the worst, work with the changes.
The best  thought out plans can sometimes take sudden and unexpected turns towards disastrous results. History, and the evening news, are full of these occurrences. 

Try to think things through, consider all the bad things that could happen, and make a plan that you think will get you to your desired end result. 

Follow that plan and hope it works. When they don’t go the way you thought they would, take a moment and think of the best way to utilize the changes. 

Then try to enjoy the result, even if you couldn’t do it exactly the way you had originally dreamed it.

Love will find you when you least expect it or are least prepared for it.
The search can be long and frustrating. Sometimes just showing up for life is all it takes to fall in the right direction. Love will usually find you after you have stopped looking and find something else to fill your time.

People are basically the same.
Color, religion, and politics don’t really matter. For the most part, we all want the same kind of things. The main thing that really affects people is an abusive or hopeless environment, or the drugs they come in contact with.


The squeaky wheel gets the oil.
The person that complains the most, usually gets pacified first. But sometimes that squeaky wheel just gets replaced. Let your thoughts be known if it is important to you, but don’t constantly complain about everything.

Things usually happen for a reason.
It may not seem like it at the time. In fact, you may not be aware of the reason for years. In some cases you may never know. But there is usually a reason. It may have even been your own fault. Occasionally though, there is no rhyme, reason, or even the slightest bit of sense. Shit just happens.

Use it or loose it.
The mind and body need constant exercise. If you don’t use it, muscles turn to flab, and the brain turns to mush. I’m sure the same goes for sex. You just can’t get enough practice for some things.

Don’t do things half assed.
If you are going to do something, or anything, give it all you’ve got.  Otherwise you will never be completely satisfied with the results, and may even wonder why you bothered in the first place.

It is easier to do nothing, than to attempt anything at all.
It just is. You may never get anywhere or do anything, but it is always easier than trying.

Life and Karma have a wicked sense of humor.
Try to live a life that keeps them on your side. There is a ying yang full circle of kismet floating around that is just looking for a reason to mess with you.

You can do anything with just three things:
Time, determination, and money. Unfortunately, most of us are lacking in at least one of those ingredients for success.

It’s easier to tell the truth than to remember lies.
Unless you have an exceptionally good memory. I don’t, so I usually tell the truth….or at least some semblance of the truth.

Things that appear to be simple, rarely are.
And you never realize it until well after you have committed yourself to the task.


Nothing in life is totally black and white.
There are always shades of gray, several sides to any story, and most of the time, hidden agendas.

Eat dessert first.
Life is short. You may choke on the brussel sprouts and never get to taste life‘s real goodies.

Arguing and fighting rarely accomplish anything,
except that is usually pisses everybody off even more. Agree to disagree...and then do whatever you felt like doing in the first place. Which brings us to:

It’s better to apologize than to ask for permission.
At least you’ll get to do whatever it was you wanted to do.


That's all I have for now. What kinds of things has life taught you?

Tic Toc...When I grow up

"Tic Toc!"
Said the clock,
as time flew out the window.
"Hours of seconds,
Many have passed.

Are you where you thought you'd be?"

When I was growing up, I had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up.

I was probably in the third grade the first time an adult asked me “When you grow up, what do you want to be?”

I’m sure I got that blank oh-my-god-you-asked-me-a math-question look, shrugged and mumbled, “I dunno.”

That answer apparently wasn’t good enough because they pressed further, “Well, what about a policeman, a firefighter or an astronaut?

I’m sure at that point I nodded my head yes, and looked for an escape from this overly nosy big person.

Later in life, I would realize that I did NOT want to have a job where people might shoot at me, or flames might eat me, or someone might forget to send me back from space.

In High School I probably took some kind of career aptitude test or met with a career counselor, but I don’t remember it. Even if I did, back then I imagine the result of that effort would have been; “With your current aptitude and attitude your test results indicate your best career choice would be something along the lines of a ditch digger.”

At that time, the fast food industry had not taken off.

Upon graduating after 12 years of schooling, I was still clueless as to what I might want to be when I grew up. Hey, High school had a lot of distractions. They were called girls.

I do remember visiting Daytona Beach in Florida and saw a guy with a trailer renting bikes, mini bikes, rafts and chairs. He parked his rig right on the sandy beach, opened up some sides and was ready to go.

That, to me, looked like the greatest job ever: Sun, beach and bikinis...and just sitting around taking peoples money for renting fun.

Too bad I lived in Ohio at the time. In case you’ve never been, Ohio is not known for the quality of its beaches. And no, I do not consider the shores of Lake Erie a beach, no matter what the local commerce department might call it.

After high school, I considered being a truck driver. I was 19. You had to be 21. I couldn’t wait. I did a few not-to-exciting jobs and when the 70’s gas crisis hit and eliminated my job as a route driver, I decided it was time to get serious about a “career”.

At that time I liked to make scale models. Not car or ship models, but models of houses designed and built from scratch, I knew my math skills sucked, so being an architect was out. (Calculators were just starting to get smaller. Back then they were called adding machines)

I looked in the phone book for businesses that made models. Lo and behold, there actually were places that made models. I made some calls and found a place that seemed remotely opened to talking to me. I gathered up my high school drawings, (usually drawn in math class) packed up some models I had made and went for an interview.

It went pretty well. In fact they asked me if I could start next Monday?

Well....

So I came in next Monday. 

They handed me a broom and said, “Start in that corner”

I asked about the model making.

“Well, we don’t have any of those right now, but if we do, we’ll give you a shot.”

For the next 20 years or so, I learned the trade show custom exhibit building business...literally from the ground floor up.

It was an interesting, fast paced and ever changing job. Perfect for my short attention span and desire to create things. I was pretty darn good at it. There were people that were better than me doing certain jobs. There were people that were faster than me. But there were few people that were as good and fast as I was at MOST things.

A few swift kicks in the seat of the pants later, I found myself starting my own business. Something the third grader me could have never envisioned.

In fact, if someone had told me in high school that I would someday have my own business, I would have laughed in his or her face…for a very long time!

Even now, I am constantly amazed that I am running my own business building custom cabinets and things for others…even if it is a business of one person.

To this day when I hear that phrase “When I grow up...”

Well, as soon as I grow up, I’ll let you know.

Find more blogs and prompts at:

Blogging For Fun Facebook group

This was this weeks prompts:

  What did you want to be when growing up?

Flowers from here and there

I love to travel. 

When I travel, I love to take pictures.

I have been accused of traveling for the sake of taking pictures.

In those travels, I have taken pictures of flowers. I am usually not too impressed with my photos of JUST flowers, particularly single flowers. I guess I have seen so many photos of flowers that unless it's something spectacular, it's just ANOTHER flower picture...at least the one's I take.

I do, however, seem to use flowers frequently as part of the bigger picture.

I think I am just a "bigger picture" kind of guy.

Anywho...here are some places I have been where flowers jumped into the picture:

Morrow Rock, California

NW Harbor, Acadia National Park, Maine

Acadia National park coast

Chicago skyline from Navy Pier

I do occasionally focus my camera a little closer and sometimes it takes pretty decent shots:

Gainesville, Florida Butterfly Garden

I hope you enjoyed my photos! This was written for this weeks "Flowers " prompt from:

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Somebody's watching me during my close calls

Being a lazy...uh, I mean resourceful person, I am going to combine this weeks BFF challenges "Somebody's Watching Me" and "Close Calls".

Several years ago I owned a cute little 1996 Tracker.

Because it is so small, I affectionately dubbed it the quarter car or the Jeepknee, because it is about knee high to a real Jeep. I bought it as a fun, weekend drive-in-the-country vehicle.

It has two fiberglass tops that can be removed for open air cruising: Perfect for looking at all of the great architecture in little Ohio towns.

It was almost as much fun as cruising on a motorcycle, except I didn't have to worry about hitting gravel patches.

 

One day, several years ago, I was on the way back from a site visit in Cincinnati driving in my little Jeepknee.

A Semi suddenly decided to share a lane with me.

(Thats what I get for leaving enough space between me and the car ahead!). There was no one in front of him but he suddenly changed lanes. To make matters worse, he suddenly slammed on his brakes.

I swerved to avoid him and found out first hand about the roll over issues associated with tall SUVS.

The tail end first swerved out to the right, then a touch of the wheel, compensated too much, and it swerved out the left. It then decided to spin all the way around until I was heading backwards on all four lanes of Northbound I-75...staring straight at the front of another Semi truck bearing down on me. The momentum of the first swerves continued until the tracker went sideways. This time it was going to slow to slide on the tires, so it flipped over and slid another 50 feet or so…on its top.

Apparently, the driver of the Semi never saw my bright, flame red Tracker. He continued on his merry way, leaving me upside down in the middle of heavy traffic.

Thanks asshole. Glad I took such good care of my little baby for the last six years.

It took me about 10 minutes to get my big butt out of the wreckage. I had to give someone the keys so they could unlock the back hatch and I could crawl out.   

This was my Tracker after that close call:

My hair should have been much shorter for a really long time.

The amazing thing is, I didn't have a scratch on me. This is the second time I have been in an accident where the vehicle didn't have the greasy side down, and I walked out of it without a scratch.

All I can say is: 

Somebody must be watching over me, and those Angels must love me.

Now the real question is; Is the third time a charm, or do I have cats lives and still have eight more to go?

Drive careful folks. And I hope your angels are watching you too.

For the love of, and for, children

I was being especially lazy Sunday morning when the phone rings. 

I roll over in bed and pick up the phone. It's Chelsea Keechle and she informs me that our "Grand children" are on the way over. "Technically" they are not OUR grandchildren, but as far as I am concerned, they ARE. 

We pull ourselves together just in time to meet three very excited young kids at the door. Emily has been working on a project for us and she hands a yellow paper to me. The bottom is slightly soaked, but all but a few words are readable.

The last line has a question that I do not catch with the first read because the first few words are smeared. Later Emily says "You didn't answer the question."

I ask her what was the question? 

"Do you love me?" she says. 

"Yes. Yes we do!" More than ever.

Yeah, I think we can spoil them as good as any grand parent.

Dear Mom...

Dear Mom

Thank you for having me. If not for you (and a little input from Dad) I wouldn't be here wandering amongst the living.

Thank you for changing all my dirty diapers so many years ago. I blame the frequency and intensity of the odor on the baby food. I apologize profusely.

Thanks for spending countless hours showing me those dang Math "flash cards". I must have been one cute kid for you to not have strangled me during those trying times.

I had absolutely no interest in math and I'm sure my stubbornness against learning it was frustrating. You knew all I wanted to do was to go outside and play and yet you persisted against incredible odds. I still suck at math, but I do wish I had spent more time trying to let you teach me, and less time fighting you against it. Those trials did lead me to find one of my long time passions: ART! No math required. 

 You may be happy to hear, or not, that I can still be just a stubborn!

Thanks for allowing us the freedom to roam. While I am sure there were times when you were glad to have all three of us out of the house, I am also sure it was hard not to worry about us every time we ventured into the world; riding our bikes around the neighborhood, or running wild through the woods during summer vacation. That youthful freedom instilled a curiosity about the world and a sense of adventure that remains strong to this day.

Thanks for coddling us when we needed it, but allowing us the freedom to learn from our mistakes. Although I never figured out why all of those flying contraptions and parachuting off the roof never worked, I did learn the dynamics of gravity and that testing the first draft of a concept with a live human is not always a good idea. To this day, I am much better at thinking things through, planning and organizing.

Thanks for not buying us everything we always wanted. While we weren't poor, I know we were far from being rich. I am sure there were many Birthdays and Christmases where I didn't get everything I wanted. The truth is: I don't remember them. We had everything we needed. It taught me to appreciate the things I do have. It also taught me that the things I really want, but don't really need, will be discounted eventually. (On the other hand, thanks for the chrome "Spyder" bike! That was awesome!)

Thanks for making me practice my trumpet for a half hour every freaking day whether I wanted to or not.

After many years, I actually got pretty good at it. It was good to know that if I wanted to be the best trumpet player in the high school band, I could have. Of course, that would have required even more practice. All that trumpet playing gave me one of my other lifelong passions: Music

Thanks for trying to teach me to play the piano. To this day I wish I knew how to play it, but I am also aware that I don't have enough desire to spend a half hour a day practicing. I always enjoyed hearing you play it, and I even had a pretty good time when you "coerced" me into accompanying you with my trumpet for that church event.

Thank you for putting up with me for almost 18 years while I lived at home.

And to all the other "Mothers" out there:

Happy Mothers Day!

Always remember and never forget:

While there will be times when your kids don't seem to appreciate you, deep down they do, and always will.