My Blue Heaven

I am not a particularly religious person, so I imagine my image of heaven may be a bit skewed than most peoples.

Most of my life I have played by the rules that a polite society drummed into me. (Well, maybe slightly bent rules.) I have (almost) always been the good boy.

So my image of heaven may start out with those 21 virgins from the Muslim religion. Hmm, I wonder if those would have to be Muslim women?

Actually, now that I type that, I think I would prefer non virgins. Ladies that know what to do and aren’t afraid to try it.  Yeah, that would make for a better heaven.

Or, better yet, maybe all the old “girlfriends” I never had sexually, but wanted. Now we're talking! Of course, I would have the libido of a 18 year old with the knowledge I have now...And they would all want me as much I had wanted them.

I only add all the caveats because I am reminded of the way wishes turned out in that old “Monkey Paw” story. You really gotta cover all the bases when talking eternity, ya know?

Being an avid photographer, I also see heaven as a beautifully visual place, where the temperature would always comfortable unless you FELT like standing in a freezing rain.

If there were other people there, they would be pleasant, intelligent, and considerate. You know, like people SHOULD be anyway. A little (okay, a LOT of) humor would also be needed.

In heaven we should also have the option of visiting this old Earth, if we felt like it. 

I’m sure when I die, there will be places I wanted to see, and things I wanted to do, that I did not get to do before Death tapped me on the shoulder. Unless I took my own life, I should be able to do that. After all, there are a few heavenly places right here on Earth.

I also think that, while we were flying around the living earth, (and yes, flying freely would be a part of heaven) we should be able to help the living if we can.  I think we should be allowed to whisper in their ears, things like: 

“Do not go in the basement!” 

 
or “Do not go down that dark alley” 

 
or “ That sheet will NOT work like a parachute no matter how many floors up you jump from.”

Sooo, that is pretty much my idea of Heaven. I reserve the right to alter or change as desired at any point in time.

What is your idea of heaven?